Posts written by Sean Patrick Payne

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Manchild at Play, a.k.a Stuff You Can Steal From My House When You Inevitably Break in After Reading This

A Facebook post about my glass cabinets full of figures.

The other day I finally managed to cross off one of the things on my (admittedly rather limited and lacking in scope) list of things I’ve always wanted to do (aside from buy a plastic figure of Dr. Robotnik). For years I’ve made do with wooden shelves, converted bedside cabinets…

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June 1, 2013 at 12:00 pm | Action Figures, Batman, Manchild at Play (Toys), Video Games | 3 comments

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Retraction: I Managed to Be a Complete Bastard in Fallout: New Vegas

Max Valerion stood at the gates to the Vegas Strip.

Warning: this blog post contains spoilers for not just the ending of Fallout: New Vegas, but the expanded DLC (DownLoadable Content) missions too. One of the first articles I placed on the Blogsplosion was a lengthy exploration of my character Max Valerion, within which I explained my disappointment at how…

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May 19, 2013 at 2:34 pm | Articles, Video Games, Villains | No comment

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Random Guesswork: Batman: Arkham Origins Is Probably Going to Suck Balls (But I Hope Not)

Batman: Arkham Origins

I rarely join in with fandoms having gut reactions to changes in their beloved franchises, especially negative ones. One of my prouder fan moments must have been reserving judgement about Daniel Craig back when he was first announced as being the next James Bond. The tabloids shit themselves inside-out with…

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April 25, 2013 at 6:24 pm | Batman, Random Guesswork, Video Games | 2 comments

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The Many Diabolical Machines of Dr. Robotnik

Classic Dr. Robotnik Figure with EggRobos

Very recently I fixed a small injustice in my life, by spending what most would class as an extortionate amount of money on a small figure my five year old self was denied, not because my parents didn’t buy it for me, but because it simply didn’t exist. It’s Dr….

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February 25, 2013 at 12:17 am | Articles, Video Games, Villains | 3 comments

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Spammers Say the Most Poetic Things

Spambot 2.0, flailing in front of a computer.

When you run a WordPress-based blog (like this), you have to take measures to ensure that the people commenting are actually people. There are these clever programs that scamper about the web looking for WordPress sites to leave spam comments on. Then, once you’ve got those covered, you have to…

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January 24, 2013 at 8:38 pm | Spammers, Technology | 4 comments

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Why Hitman: Absolution Isn’t Quite Right

Hitman Absolution

Disclaimer: this blog post assumes you have a modicum of knowledge about the Hitman series of games. If not, there’s not much point in reading further! I’ve also tried to keep this as spoiler-free as possible. I’m well aware that it’s all too easy to use the internet to bitch…

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January 2, 2013 at 4:40 am | Reviews, Video Games | No comment

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The Year in Blogs: 2012

Here’s a yearly round-up of all the blog posts I made through 2012! The year where I tried to turn my blog into being exclusively about James Bond! Why I Can’t Be a Bastard in Fallout: New Vegas – 26/04 “Max Valerion” was a character I created in Fallout 3,…

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January 1, 2013 at 11:00 am | The Year in Blogs | No comment

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Three Blokes and a Chick Watch: Casino Royale

Casino Royale

You have to understand that there’s a reason I like Casino Royale so much. Put yourself in my position – you’ve just watched the Bond franchise fire a nail gun into its own ball-sack over and over for two hours in the absolutely dire Die Another Day, a film that…

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December 31, 2012 at 11:21 pm | Films, James Bond, Three Blokes and a Chick Watch | No comment

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Three Blokes and a Chick Watch: A View to a Kill

Death of Zorin

If there’s something to be said about A View to a Kill, it’s that it’s 80’s. Very 80’s. If AVtaK (which in itself sounds like a failed Sinclair or Amstrad computer) was a person, it would grease back its hair, wear cheap suits from Woolworths, carry a brick phone and…

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November 9, 2012 at 4:49 pm | Films, James Bond, Three Blokes and a Chick Watch | No comment

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A Random Collection of Thoughts on Skyfall

Skyfall

I went to the nearest multiplex cinema with the two blokes and a chick yesterday, and there was an interesting turn of events. Prior to seeing the film, the two blokes weren’t brilliantly keen on Daniel Craig’s Bond and I was rather fond of him (he would rank second behind…

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November 4, 2012 at 9:46 pm | Films, James Bond, Three Blokes and a Chick Watch | 2 comments

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The PAYNEful Portfolio - examples of my work and articles written about web development Tales of Sin - The Hitman's Tale Labb Rat: A tale of one Private Eye's quest to find the EXIT Tales of Sin - Sci-fi chronicles of the future Steel Nation - Rise of the Two Doctors webcomic series